Tuesday, October 14, 2003

PHOENIX -- Call it a heart attack on a stick.

Visitors to the Arizona State Fair can climb the Mount Everest of cholesterol with a fried cheeseburger. It's ground beef wrapped around a stick, then wrapped in cheese, coated in batter and deep-fried. The final product looks like an oversize corn dog.

If that's not enough, fairgoers also have the Kaktus Kutter. It's a chunk of hot pepper cheese stuffed inside a green chili, then wrapped in roast beef, turkey or ham. The whole thing is batter-dipped and deep-fried.

For desert, there's always fried Twinkies.

And while the Chinese are flinging their best and brightest into the ether, the Americans are plumbing the great and murky depths of deep-frying any goddamned thing they can shove in their mouths.

I need, NEED, to start my own nation, very soon. Who's coming with?

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